I    a m    t h e    R a i n b o w

On the days when it doesn't seem worth it. When you think that maybe they were right. That "queer" and "freak" and "abomination" seem to have your name on the list. When "outsider" and "other" or "faggot" or "dyke" want to claim your autograph, remember. We are the rainbow.

When never seems bigger than always, and always seems like a terrible place to be, remember. We are the rainbow.

When darkness wants to win more than anything. When love feels empty or too much work, remember. When family is a foreign country, and you can't seem to find your passport, remember. When "everybody" seems to mean "everybody but you" remember. You are the rainbow.

RED is the heat and purity of your goodness. The fire of the love in the universe you have all the right to claim. Red is the heat of your wholeness. The flame of your soul. Red is the sunrise promise of being all. Red is hot. Red is pepper bite of the edge, of the excitement, of the burnfull flavor of the truths that set you free. Indian red. Crimson. Cinnabar. Vermilion. Red is the filling blood. The life force river you ride. Red is the rose-colored glass half full. The magic slippers. The full bloom of the claret. Red is the letter day. The town you will paint. The last cent you will spend which return full fold. Red is the rainbow. You are the rainbow.

ORANGE is the citrus zip of the brink. Orange is the sweet peach tang of the subtlety of the flavor. The copper burnish of your experience. Orange is the clockwork we've had to live by up 'till now. Orange is the paradise bird who flies at your shoulder. Orange is the juice of an enemy's glass crushed into dust and into diamonds we could spend on our own behalf. Orange is the agent of our discontent, our driver till we can make everything human again, and in perfect balance restored. Orange is the pal of black's ghosts and goblins we put behind us every hour on the way. Orange is all the afterglow. Orange is the rainbow. You are the rainbow.

YELLOW is the taxi on our way to Where. Yellow is the phosphorous fireworks we make in concert. Yellow is blue's co-conspirator in green's creation. The lemon bite. The gold pot. Rainbow's reward. The loves-me/loves me daisy in your daily bouquet. Here comes the sun. Yellow is the rainbow. You are the rainbow.

GREEN is the grass of home we've had to struggle to invent. Green is too many frogs to kiss in one life time. Green is ever, and the future as we decide to grow it. Green is the olive spurt and accent we repeatedly select for spicing. Green is the cricket song that lures us on, sure and cyclic as the locust. Green is the square of the village gathering around us in our favor. Green is the occasional lime-tang sweetness-sour that bears witness to our own life's drink and our delicious contrasts. Green is a warm moist house to look safe out from, in our nurturance and abundance, at to the sometimes chill of the isolating out-there. Green pepper, the sweet-taste self-contradiction to the words they use in our description. The aquamarine and malachite and jade of our richness, and our solid treasure. Green is the sour-tart satisfying contrast. Green is the perpetuality of the sea. Green is the rainbow. You are the rainbow.

BLUE is the sky's limit of our possibilities. The ocean depth of our love. Blue is the edgy flavor of the cheese that gives such delicious differentiation. Blue is the tiny highway map line that find us in all the corners and the hiding places. Blue is a once-in-a-while moon we thought we'd never accomplish and were wrong. Blue is the song we've sung too long in silence. Blue is where the bolt comes from out of. The wild yonder. The suede shoes. Blue is the rainbow. You are the rainbow.

PURPLE is the prose and the passion. The perfect plum for thumb's pulling. Love's lavender light. Purple is the deep. The brilliant, imaginary cow. The mountain's majesty. Purple is the royal WE. Purple is the rainbow. You are the rainbow.

Sometimes it's hard to hold onto the rainbow when the world is only serving up gray. Or black and white. Remember, I am the rainbow. You are the rainbow. WE are the rainbow. Together, we are each a source of a different color. We give off such a joyful, lovely light.

W E    A R E    T H E    R A I N B O W !

(c) 1999 Shelly Roberts. All Rights Reserved. Shelly Roberts is an internationally syndicated lesbian columnist and author of BABY DYKES new from Alyson Publications.

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